Happy Holidays!

On Sunday, December 23, it will be one year since visiting a doctor about what I thought was a rash.  Then, in January, I wrote to let you all know that I had breast cancer.  Now, as 2012 nears the end, I find myself reflecting over the past year.  The challenges of this year have changed me forever.  I found even more strength and an inner peace that I did not know I had.   I discovered yoga.  I’ve walked a couple of hundred miles.  I learned I could live without breasts, but my crazy curly chemo hair drives me a little insane. 

I have been feeling great and taking full advantage of my energy and good health.  Friends and family have visited and we have shown them around Richmond.  We have visited Long Island, Peaks of Otter, VA, Leland, NC, Washington, DC, Drakes Branch, VA, Fredericksburg, VA, and Charleston, SC.  

While I do not know how long I will ride this wave, I do know that if I do fall down, my “village” will be there to pick me up and keep me going.  Thank you – all of you!

I am having a PET /CT  body scan on December 31^st.  I am feeling great, so I don’t expect any surprises.  I will let you all know the results as soon as we get them. 

As we have done for the past several years, Bob and I have made a holiday donation to charity. This year, we chose the American Cancer Society.   Our hope is that someday soon, we will wake up to see a headline that says: CANCER IS CURED!

Best wishes for a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Ribbons around the country

It is hard to keep up with all the pink and ribbons, but here are some submissions from Colorado, North Carolina, and Virginia.

Sweet treats in NYC

I made a pit stop at Magnolia Bakery in Bloomingdales while walking through NYC today. Any excuse for a cupcake!

Sister time!

Mom spent the day with her sisters yesterday, which involved doing their part to stimulate the economy. The Brighton store had this balloon so, of course, Mom has to buy herself a necklace!

Hometown Awareness

Even Simsbury is getting in on the pink ribbon fun.

The Zumbathon sounds like lots of fun!

Go shopping!

Thank you all for continuing to send in your favorite pink ribbon items. Below are some more of our favorites. If you needed an excuse to go shopping, this is a pretty good one.

It's October - exactly ten months from diagnosis.  In retrospect, this year was a blur. In real time, it flowed like molasses in winter. 

Adrienne's blog post highlights the pink ribbons that are everywhere this month to raise awareness of breast cancer and to raise support for research to beat it.  I'll take this opportunity to again thank all of you for your support - whether it was a contribution to cancer research or moral support in all forms for Linda and others.  Awesome stuff - we'll never forget it.  It means so much to us.

Linda's last check-up with her oncologist was quick and easy.  No trouble found.  She has been going to the Y twice a week for the Livestrong program, and does some yoga (which, as I understand it, involves lying down on a mat for 15 minutes and thinking about exercising).  She has been walking, weather permitting, about 3 miles a day for months now (I think by now she must be just west of Kansas City!).

We have been enjoying making up for lost time from the first half of 2012.  Highlights for September and October include:

• Linda's high school friends Nancy and Mary here for a great weekend
• A weekend getaway in Fredericksburg touring a Civil War battlefield
• Painted our living room, family room, kitchen, bathroom, and dining room
• A walking food tour in downtown Richmond
• A visit with Jess and TJ in DC for my birthday
• A bluegrass concert
• A jazz/funk/Indian concert
• First Friday in Richmond
• Faculty reception at the University
• A weekend getaway at Peaks of Otter in the western part of VA (see picture below)
• A newly-formed dinner club

Still to come this year:

• A visit with family on Long Island
• Friends from CT going with us to Charleston, SC
• Friends from Seattle staying with us for a week
• My parents coming up for Thanksgiving week
• A few more events at the University
• Broadway in Richmond's performance of The Grinch
• Jessica's graduation from the University of Maryland (Masters in Public Health)

Good times!

I had a private laugh as I took this picture this weekend at Peaks of Otter.  In this month of Breast Cancer Awareness, and in honor of these ten months of endurance of my courageous wife, I've captioned this picture Mountain Cleavage.  I wish I had a pink ribbon big enough to wrap around these two peaks.

A pink ribbon, no matter what

As we have learned over the last 10 months, breast cancer impacts all kinds of women without much regard for certain characteristics. Therefore, it is only fitting that the pink ribbon be on all different kinds of products.

Today's submissions include a photo of a t-shirt sent in by Symone ( Greg's mom) and a nod to Mom's organization habit, a Franklin Planner.

Shopping for a cause

Thanks, Katie, for doing your part to support a cause (and one of our favorite stores) and stimulate the economy!

Signs are everywhere

I saw two more signs today. The "Breast Cancer is a Witch" one is my favorite so far...

Awareness for what??

So, according to the Grill in our student center, it is Pink Ribbon Bagel Month. I wonder why pink ribbon bagels need more awareness?

The pink ribbon game

October is breast cancer awareness month. Ironically, it comes just at the point where we are all pretty ready to be less aware of breast cancer than we have been for the first 9 months of the year. I have always been somewhat entertained but the kinds of items that have and the abundance of pink ribbons at this time of year. I think I will be even more aware of them this year. I've decided to make a game of it. Feel free to join me. What is the most random place that you have seen a pink ribbon? Send me your pictures and I will post them here.

To get us started, here are three places that I saw the pink ribbon in the 5 minutes I was in the grocery store picking up dinner. All within site of the register.

Settling into normal

Over the last few weeks, life has gotten back to "normal" (whatever that word means now) for the "Bob Piazzas". 

Here are just a few updates:

1. Last week, I got a text message that I never thought I would get that said "Normal Brain MRI!" I'd like to think if it wasn't normal, I would have gotten more than a text message. Some back story: Mom started traveling again including a weekend to visit with the Piazzas in North Carolina and 3.5 days in Hershey, PA with all the Sheridans.  

After a weekend of eating the contents of Grandma Piazza's freezer (cream cheese brownies, chocolate chip cookies, schneckens...), and drinking some fairly strong Firefly and lemonades, Mom spent a few days recovering. She was very tired and dizzy.  The next weekend, we traveled to Hershey, PA.  Mom recognized her new boundaries and ate a bit less chocolate than she normally would.  Even though she was feeling a lot better, she talked to her oncologist about it.  Dr. S decided it would be best to rule out anything big and sent Mom for a brain MRI.  Good news, all is clear (other than some lingering chemo brain)!  Mom still feels a little dizzy in the morning right before she gets out of bed. It is likely that the dizziness is being caused by the Tamoxifan (hormone therapy) or Mom's blood pressure medicine. Hopefully, it will stop soon.

2. Earlier today, during our daily after work phone chat, Mom said "I got new boobies today."  (Again, not something I ever thought I would hear my mother say...)  Mom went to a place called Stepping Stones.  There, she was fitted for new bras and prosthesis. Right now, the biggest adjustment is wearing a bra again.  After months and months without, it is a little restricting.  However, she's looking forward to trying on her closet and wearing some "new" clothes again.  And the best news: they are covered by insurance!

Speaking of boobs, Mom has been in touch with a doctor on Long Island that does the type of reconstruction that she is considering.  She has a consultation scheduled for October while she is up visiting family. It would be a very lengthy surgery (we've heard 12-18 hours as an estimate) so she still isn't sure.  Perhaps she'll get used to her surgery-free and cost-free boobs instead.  We're hoping she gets another 54 years out of the next set!

3. Mom got her haircut! Well, she got a few hairs cut but it is a start.  

4. Mom doesn't have a doctor's appointment on her calendar for a whole month! To celebrate, Mom and Dad are going on a much-deserved getaway this weekend to an inn in Fredericksburg, VA.  Rumor has it there may be a carriage ride involved.  They are also trying to plan the "perfect' vacation for November.  If you have suggestions, feel free to leave a comment below.

5.  Mom is now going to yoga/meditation once a week and the Livestrong exercise program at the YMCA, twice a week. She is hoping to be able to climb mountains very soon.

Sharing some gratitude

As we (well, really, Mom) move past the physical side effects of the cancer treatments, we are left with some unexpected side effects – the ones that don’t show up physically.  The ones that haven’t really been talked about, written about, or even acknowledged.  One of those, for me, is the changed meaning of “stepping up.”

Over the last few months, I have been thinking a lot about how and when people “show up” or “step up” and how I would want to do it for others.  There have been so many examples to learn from among our friends and family, and an occasional stranger.   In some ways, the outpouring of support has been the most overwhelming part of this whole cancer business.   I have learned that support comes in many, many forms and sometimes from an unexpected source.  I have learned that it is ok to ask what someone needs or wants.  I have learned that some of the best support comes when the “rush” is over, the cancer starts to feel normal, and someone asks “how are you?” and waits for the answer.  I have always said that lasagnas are love, but I have learned that so too are tacos, chicken pot pie, pots of chili, homemade meatballs, soups, casseroles, cookies, and just about anything that you don’t have to make yourself.  I have learned that the caregivers need support in addition to the patient, including being reminded to take care of themselves.  With friends and family scattered around the world, support also showed up in the mail and in boxes on the front steps in the form of flowers, movies, cards, and thoughtful gifts.  We were spoiled with pictures and videos of cute children (and hope that these continue).  And once, from a kind neighbor who is also a breast cancer survivor, it showed up in the form of a bag of rolls hanging from the door knob.  As Mom was able to get out and about, support came in the form of visits to Noodles and Company, double dates, and afternoon teas.

I have learned that people show support in their own ways and that all of it is welcome.  So, when it is my turn, I know to do it in my own way.  That there is no wrong way. This is one of the many lessons that we will carry forward.  And until we have the chance to pay it forward, we want to thank you all for showing up and stepping up in so many ways.  Thank you for continuing to read for updates.  While updates may be less frequent, we will update when there is information to share.  We have felt your support and appreciated it. All your small gestures helped move us along on hard days.  It has been overwhelming and humbling. 

“I only show up when I think I can be of service and that service can be valued”

(my dear friend, Oprah Winfrey)

Moving On!

What happens now that primary treatment is over?  How do I navigate life after treatment? How do I live in the present while maintaining hope for the future?

Last week, I had a CT Scan and the drs office called to tell me that there was no evidence of new cancer.  Instead of jumping up and down in excitement, I asked does that mean there’s evidence of the old cancer?  The woman on the phone said this is good news.  My family wanted to celebrate. I have to learn to live in the present and accept good news for what it is:  good news!  I don’t know what my future holds (does anyone, really?) but for now it is time to move on….

Here are pictures of me moving on and enjoying life after intense treatment!

I was so happy to be a part of Jessica and TJ’s move!  Organizing and supervising are two of my favorite activities and I have a lot of experience moving:

Adrienne’s 30^th birthday weekend was a blast and I did participate in most of it (not the slip and slide, however): 

Adrienne and I took a 5 hour car ride to NC to visit family at Oak Island.   I was thrilled to have my toes in the sand (I waited until evening, so as to avoid the hot sun!)

Next up, Hershey, PA with the Sheridan’s.  Pictures to follow…

Milestones in video

It's been a while since we've posted.  Mom's done a little bit of traveling.  We celebrated my 30th birthday.  We've got more to say and it will come in time.  But, in the meantime, I wanted to share 3 videos that I think help capture the last 6 months.

This first video was filmed in Jess' apartment in DC on Christmas Eve 2011.  The day before, Mom had gone to her doctor for a "rash" that concerned her on her right breast.  They gave her some antibiotics to treat a potentially clogged milk duct.  I thought that was funny.  I mean, who gets a clogged milk duct at 55?!  The cancer was there on Christmas Eve, we just didn't know it. Blissful ignorance in the form of a kitchen dance party.  By the way, we were making fried cauliflower, a Christmas Eve tradition.

This second video, you've seen before.  It's Mom dancing her way out of her last chemo treatment.  Chemo, in my opinion, was the hardest part of the treatment so far.  It felt unpredictable and unknown.  It had lots of it's own side effects.  It was the chemo that made Mom seem "sick".

And this last video was filmed almost two weeks ago at my 30th birthday celebration.  Mom looks different than she did 6 months ago, but her dancing spirit is still there.

I have watched these videos over and over, particularly the first one, in the last few months.  Sometimes with laughter.  Sometimes with tears.  Always with gratitude that we can still dance.

And then there were none...radiation is over!

Feeling just like the last day of school:  "No more pencils, no more books..."

The best view of a cancer institute is in the rear view mirror

Touch

I have been hibernating in the a/c in the hot afternoons, for the past week watching episodes of the TV series Touch.  The premise of this show is “we are all interconnected.  Our lives are invisibly tied to those whose destinies touch ours.” 

A young boy, who does not speak, sees the past, present, future and how it is all connected.  He communicates with his dad through numbers and manipulates the connections to fix problems in people’s lives. 

Today, I left home even earlier than usual to go to my second to last radiation treatment.  I was walking down the stairs to the treatment area when a woman coming up the stairs hesitated then turned and asked me “Do you have breast cancer?”  At this moment, our lives connected, me as I come to the end of my intense treatment journey (remember my resistance to this term when I was first diagnosed-I think I get it now) and hers as she is just beginning.  She meets with her oncologist today to get a treatment plan and asked me a million questions.  I felt as if I was looking at myself, less than six months ago and I saw how far I have come. She was reassured that I looked so good and was smiling.  I hugged her and told her she would be ok, that she would get through it all as I have.  We exchanged contact info and will keep in touch.

I can’t help but think that this could be an episode of Touch.   

#PinItToGiveIt

For Pinterest users:

A few weeks ago, I posted about the workshop that Mom and I attended with Look Good, Feel Better.  Since then, Mom has become a master at some of the tips she learned.  Earlier today, Elizabeth Arden launched an innovative new philanthropy campaign on Pinterest. For every repin from their #PinItToGiveIt board, Elizabeth Arden will donate one product to Look Good Feel Better.
So, start pinning!


Here is a link to the board.

And then there were 8!

Today marked day 22 of radiation.  Mom drove herself to her appointment, which she has been doing since the beginning of this round of treatment.  Mom’s treatment on the radiation machine is a quick one: in and out in 20 minutes.  But today was a little different.  On her way out, Mom found out she'd won the lottery.  Well, her version of the lottery.  She found out that there had been a slight miscommunication in the beginning and instead of having 33 radiation treatments, she was only having 30.  3 less! According to her, it is like winning a million bucks.  She has 3 more rounds of radiation to the whole area.  The area is made up of her chest and underarm on the right side, the cancer side.  Then, they will do 5 rounds of radiation just to the incision scar on the right side.  Barring any equipment malfunction, she will be done with treatment by June 29.  That means not going into July.  It may seem like a small thing, but it is a HUGE thing psychologically.  Cue the happy dance.

So far, Mom's skin has been holding up pretty well to radiation.  We are hoping that continues for the next 10 days!  She hasn't had to upgrade to the heavy duty "magic" cream and continues to use over the counter aquaphor.  She is pretty sensitive to heat and humidity, so the next few days of 97+ degree weather will be challenging.  She may have to do some mall walking instead of her normal outside loop.  Fortunately, the mall she plans to walk in has a bakery that makes really delicious cake pops...(By the way, her sweet tooth is back.)

I find the countdown to the end of treatment to be a bit strange.  It definitely means the end of an intense series of interventions.  There is definitely cause for celebration.  But, it is not the end of the road.  Mom will still go every 4 weeks for her Zometa infusion and continue hormone therapy.  We'll wait, sometimes patiently, sometimes impatiently, until her next scan at some point in the fall.  And, we'll try to figure out whatever the new sense of normal is.  As we start to see that there could be an end to intense treatment, we know that there are others that we love who are just getting started and/or are deep in treatment.  We hope for continued improved health for those with cancer and an ability to remember self-care for the caregivers.  Our thoughts are with all of them.

Heads Up!

It seems like the story of Linda’s health is told by her hair.  It was tough to see it fall to the floor four months ago, but it is pretty darn cool to see it now growing back as she regains her health.  She won’t be plugging in the blow dryer anytime soon, but it is a signal of better days ahead (get it?  aHEAD!).

As part of her on-going treatment, she was back to the hospital last Thursday morning for a Zometa infusion.  Zometa protects the bones and will be a part of Linda’s medical regimen for a long time.  As the nurse was preparing the injection, she asked us if we had any plans for rest of the day.  We told her that it was our 32^nd anniversary, so we would be going to her radiation treatment that afternoon to celebrate.  We know how to have good time.

Her radiation treatments are about one-third done and continue daily, except for a glitch last week when the machine was down for repair.  If there are no more delays, she will be done with radiation on July 5, and will celebrate a different kind of independence day with that! One interesting side effect of the different treatments she’s had appears to be the suppression of Linda’s humility gene.  Never one to call attention to herself or her accomplishments, she now talks about her beautifully shaped head (it’s true, no dents, no blemishes – perfectly shaped!).

On Saturday, the hospital sponsored an event to coincide with National Cancer Survivor Day for anyone whose life has been detoured by cancer, including their families and friends.  Linda, Adrienne, Jessica, and I went together and got to see many of the hospital staff in a non-clinical setting.  At the same time an event like this staggers you because you see the many lives impacted by cancer, and then it raises your hope because of all the progress made to help them.  Sadness infused with hope.  As one of the Cancer Institute speakers said on behalf of the doctors, nurses, and staff, “It’s this kind of event that makes our jobs so worthwhile.”  I’ll drink to that!  If you’ve ever donated to cancer research, you did a good thing.

Here’s a picture of Linda with her Oncologist, Dr. Susan Schaeffer.

Red Carpet Treatment for Survivors

Looking Good, Feeling Better

Last week, Mom met with her oncologist.  The doc said she looked great and healthy and should be pleased with the way things have gone so far.  Then, gave her a big hug.  It's great to have affirmation. In this stage, there are lots of appointments to manage.  In addition to going to radiation every day (Monday-Friday at 10a.m. until July 2), Mom is going to physical therapy twice a week to work on the cording in her arm and general range of motion.  Monthly, she will check in with her oncologist and surgeon as well as going to the infusion center for Zometa, a drug to help strengthen her bones.  Mom has done 3 of the radiation treatments and there are no ill effects yet.  There are some effects from the hormone therapy, but "nothing awful" (Dad's words.  I'm curious to know more but afraid to ask.)

Over the weekend, Mom went on her first excursion out of Richmond since her diagnosis and visited Jess in DC.  Proof that when this woman puts her mind on a goal, she makes it happen!  Mom and Dad also had a fun afternoon in Richmond on Sunday including attending Richmond's first Food Truck Derby.


Tonight, Mom and I went to a program at the hospital called Look Good, Feel Better. It was a two hour workshop on make-up designed for women going through cancer treatments. It was a fun way to pamper Mom a bit. And, she walked away with about $200 worth of free make-up donated by most of the major cosmetics companies! In addition to discovering that Mom lost most of her eyebrows and eye lashes without any of us noticing (we think it's because they were so light in the first place), we learned how to make a turban out of a t-shirt.  This will be much cooler for the summer heat!  She's got some peach fuzz hair growing in, but it will probably be a while still before her hair grows back fully.

It was also really special for Mom to be in a room surrounded by women who had also been detoured by cancer. One was much older, one was much younger. All of the women had their own stories. But, they also had one big thing in common.

Here are some snapshots of the evening:

Mom's goody bag of products

Before her "makeover"

All the products from her goody bag

All done! Check out that smile!

A Natural and Unnatural History

Prior to Mom's surgery, I wrote a post about our family's frequent conversations about breasts.  Imagine my surprise (and entertainment) when I found out that someone else was also "consumed" by them.  I first heard about Florence William's book "Breasts: A Natural and Unnatural History" on a morning radio show.  I ordered 3 copies of the book that afternoon (one for me, Mom, and Jess-I figure Dad can share with Mom if he really wants to read it...).  Since then, I've heard about the book in other various media outlets.  I'll be delivering books to Mom and Jess this weekend.  If you'd like to join us in this literary/scientific/humorous journey, feel free!

According to one review "Be brave, buy this book, and withstand the giggles and sniggers of your friends. For here is a wonderful history, stretching across hundreds of millions of years, of an astonishingly complex part of the human body.  Williams weaves together research on nutrition, cancer, psychology, and even structural engineering to create a fascinating portrait of the breast: that singular gland that gave us, as mammals, our very name." (Carl Zimmer)

Click here to visit her website

Sorry, Dad, I fear there are even more conversations about boobs in your future.

(If you do by the book, I'm under familial obligation to encourage you to order from Barnes and Noble!)